When life gives you lemons.....

On Sunday the 25th I took the bus from Belfast to Dublin Airport (2.5 hours) followed by the bus to Navan (1 hour).

I was really looking forward to this experience at "Pat & Mary's Place" as they had a small farm with a bakery. I knew in advance that I would be staying in a room in their house and that I would be the only WWoofer there. The previous farm takes three WWoofers during the summer and one during the winter, this farm only takes one at a time year round. As for how I choose how long to stay at places, it was really all in what they decided. I would have preferred to stay one week at each place but the first farm required at least 2 weeks because of the amount of time to train people. My other placements were okay with one week though.

As I arrived at the bus stop in Navan I phoned Pat to ask him to pick me up. He promptly arrived and introduced himself. Before we pulled away from the curb he instructed me to open the glove box and read a piece of paper which was the "WWoofer Rules." The rules are pretty straightforward ( I took a picture of them when he wasn't in the car today, they are on flickr). I said I did agree with them and then he stated that if at any time either one of us was not happy with how things were working out I was free to leave or they would ask me to leave. It was such a brusque arrival, I was really caught off guard.

Me: Umm okay.
Pat (who goes by Sonny): Oh and by the way you might have a problem with this but Mary is going on holiday this week so it will just be you and me but don't worry I am harmless. Do you have a problem with this?

So now is the point when I rant a bit on this blog. Here is the deal, when I was looking for WWoofing placements I specifically looked for couples as I did not want to be alone with any strange men. I could tell he was harmless but I was still uncomfortable. I would have preferred that they contact me in advance to inform me of this as I would have declined coming and stayed at the other farm for an additional week. Mary is the baker, so not only was it going to be Sonny and I alone in the house for the week, there was no baking going on. I was so caught off guard I mumbled okay and was trying to collect my thoughts.

He then asked if I drank whiskey and when I said no he asked if I needed psychiatric help.

We arrived at the house which is a standard 70's era house on a small amount of land and I met Mary. Mary was very welcoming, and it made me wish she was going to be there all the more. She gave me a tour of the house and showed me to my room. I have the top floor with a private bathroom so that is nice. We then ate dinner and Mary left. Enter uncomfortable time. Sonny shared that he found internet searching to be offensive and he hoped that wouldn't be a problem with me as I could leave. I replied no, that was fine, while secretly being so thankful for my blackberry. Now for all of those out there who are thinking "She can't go a week without the internet??" It was more about being in a foreign country in a house with a rather eccentric man for a week that made me really uncomfortable. He then railed on and on about the evils of technology and how he is a simple man. Mind you he does have a cell phone and sends text messages!

I felt like leaving wasn't an option, I didn't want to wuss out. I like to think that I am tough and can handle most things, but this was certainly unplanned. I went to sleep that night feeling very alone and wishing my fellow WWoofers were with me.

The next morning I awoke and was ready for WWoofing at 9. Unlike the previous farm, this farm has no schedule. It is whenever Sonny decided it is time to work. He feels that WWoofers are not only workers but also companions so that means I am with him pretty much all day, every day. He loves to talk, sometimes it is really interesting stories, sometimes it is mildly offensive and I just keep my mouth shut. More on that later.

Yesterday began with picking Worcestershire berries for jam. While picking Sonny asked me about my religious and political beliefs, thoughts on capital punishment, and thoughts on abortion. Light subjects for when you first meet someone! He informed me about the Catholic church and how much power they have over the region. We discussed Orange Day and he likened the parade to the KKK parading through an African American neighborhood. It was so interesting to get the other sides point of view. I can definitely see where they are coming from.

In between the heavy conversations Sonny stated that he likes to make a lot of jokes that are sexually suggestive but he won't this week as he didn't want to make me feel uncomfortable. Well that lasted a day!

Yesterday afternoon Sonny had to go look at a friends garden so he offered to drop me off at Sliabh na Caillighe which is a large group of cairns dating to 3500 BC. The whole way there he informed me of how Homer Simpson was his hero and he quoted him throughout. This was interrupted with "See this hill here? It is called The hill of Ward or Tlachta in gaelic and on Samhain back in the pagan days they would do human sacrifices RIGHT HERE." Followed by more stories of Homer Simpson.

I had a 45 minute hike up to it which was full of me thinking thoughts like: How am I going to make it this week? Is this really my vacation? Why am I so upset? How long can a week really be? Am I going to wuss out and call my parents crying? (Almost did, whew I resisted!) Did I really work 6 days a week for a year to be in this position?

As I ascended the hill I had a moment of looking around me admiring the breathtaking view. Then was my buck up moment. I gave myself a pep talk and decided that it was time to make some serious lemonade. or at least I can share these stories with my friends and family and they will get some entertainment out of them!

The cairns were really interesting, only one had been excavated, but it had beautiful carvings inside. It is such a wonderful feeling to be standing on the footsteps of people who built this so many years ago, before the worries of "Is my cell phone charged" or "How much traffic am I going to sit in today?"

On the way home Sonny told me he went to the pub with a friend and had one cider and would I like to go for another? I replied sure so we went to the local pub in the village of Dunderry which is right down the street from his house. Three ciders later he tells me he really had two ciders with his friend and am I cooking him dinner as I am his wife stand in this week! I was like um you have ham in the fridge you can cook it yourself and he said he was only kidding... right. The people in the pub were super friendly, we met a local woman who was fascinated with me being from the states. Her name is Trish and she said she will bring me a GAA jersey before I leave. She likes to give all of the WWoofers gifts, like I said, super friendly!

Trish: My you are such a beauty and look at what great teeth you have!
Sonny: I know so white, I bet she flosses.
Me: Of course I floss! Umm don't Irish people floss?
Sonny: Nope, they don't know what floss is.

And he was serious. The most interesting thing happened in the pub, at 6:00pm the church bell tolled and everyone prayed. Trish made the sign of the cross on my forehead. Dorothy you are not in Kansas anymore! Apparently everyday at 12 and 6 the church bells toll (they also play it on the radio) and it is a call to prayer.

After the pub Sonny lectured me on the perils of drunk driving as he drove drunk the 3 blocks home. He then proceeded to pass out in front of the tv. As I said, harmless.

Things I have learned so far:

The local cheers here it is "Up the Royals!" as the County Meath is known as the royals county as it was always the site of the high kings.

Apparently cider here is called "lunatic soup" a it gets you a different drunk than beer.

When you do something stupid it is called "pissing against the wind."

There is a weed here called "Red Shank" that is everywhere. The legend around it is that it grew beneath Jesus's cross and this is why there are red spots on the leaves from Jesus's blood.

When Jesus rode a donkey into Bethlehem he made a sign of the cross on the donkeys back and this is why all donkeys have a cross on their back. (Will research this ASAP)

All of the locals listen to the news at 9:20 am to find out who in the area has died. They will then go to the funerals.

I am sure the above list will be growing in the future week!

Today was spent running errands in the am and checking out the bees to make sure that all of the hives have queens. Now bees can smell adrenaline so I was trying to keep mine down but it is hard when they fly at your face! Even if you have a mesh net on. Sonny likes to put male bees (they don't sting) in his mouth to impress WWoofers. He told me it wouldn't sting him after I was impressed.

At lunch today there was a news report on gay marriage on the radio. Sonny told me about how he is totally gay friendly, his brother who passed away of AIDS was gay and one of his best friends is a lesbian. He stated that the bible says it is wrong but it is only for god to judge and all churches are welcoming of gays. He then likened being gay to being a pedophile or an adulterer and that all people can do is try not to sin, but if they still sin it will be god they answer to in the end. Today may have been the hardest day at keeping my mouth shut. My inner mantra was "Jessica you are in the middle of Ireland with a country farmer, and you only have a couple of days." It was tough. No lemonade was made out of that conversation.

After lunch today we went to hoe strawberries. Sonny's farm is kind of haphazard and scattered all about. His method of hoeing was to have me hoe a row, then go behind me and re-hoe it. I know it doesn't make much sense... On his property a house is being built by his nephews for his daughter and Sonny regaled me of how the previous WWoofer who is French used to wear provacative outfits for the boys. I told him I was too old for that. He replied that was too bad. He then told me that if he was 30 years younger I would be in trouble. 10 minutes later he told me that I was "Off the shelf" as in past my expiration date for marriage. Today when he gave me a hard time he pinched my cheeks and pulled my ears. Deep breaths.

Tonight he made a stir fry for dinner that was quite good. Over dinner he opened up about one of his daughters having a traumatic brain injury and how hard it has been on him & his wife. It was really open of him to share that with me and it just goes to show that everyone has a story and while their approach to life may be completely different than yours, their story is still worth just as much as yours.

I know this week is not what I planned but I am trying to make the best of it and just to remember that I signed up for new experiences and this most certainly is it. Lao Tzu states that without having tough times you would not be able to appreciate the easy times (really rough translation) and I guess this is my tough time. If this is the hardest it will be then I guess I am lucky because I know it definitely could be worse.